An invitation, nay, encouragement from Mummy Barrow to rant this week and I’m not the kind of girl that needs to be asked twice.

*saddles up*

This could have been a rant about many things; the horrid dark hair that has recently started sprouting somewhere about my person*, politics, a toddler who thinks it’s ok to wake at 5am every day, blogging *gasp*…but I’m only just scraping this in before midnight and so this is going to be about the more sedentary but just as rage making topic of:

People who put empty packets back in the fridge/cupboard/on the shelf.

An act that leads to frustration, delayed gratification and rage.

*glares at husband*

When I scour the shelves, naturally, I think that my desire for said item is going to be beautifully quenched as I reach out my hand in the direction of the biscuits/tea caddy/sweets/crisps – because it’s always the good stuff too, of course the empty boring food containers get thrown in the bin – only to find myself briskly swept from aaaah, I need this biscuit so bad to there are no biscuits. ALL THE BISCUITS HAVE GONE. This is merely an empty packet masquerading as a delicious treat. The bastard.

*glares at husband*

Sometimes I really want something but worse still I am a woman that wants something eleventymillion times more when she can’t have it.

Why is 30% of the contents of my kitchen cupboards an illusion, the ghost of what once was, a mocking piece of misplaced rubbish that practically cackles with glee as its lifted (suspiciously easily) from its resting place and found to be empty.

It happens all the time. I bathe in the glow of the light of the fridge, all soft and inviting, illuminating its well stoked shelves and tempting me in. I fancy a cheese sandwich for lunch *picks up cheese* oh, wait, there’s none left. Butter? That’s empty too. I’ll have something else and a cup of tea once I’ve wrestled with the bin bag and dragged all this rubbish outside…For the love of god who puts an empty milk bottle back into the fridge?!

The fridge is there *points* the cupboard is there *jabs finger* the bin is right there *waves hand furiously*.

Do not give me false hope and empty wrappers *stern face*

* yeah, it’s on my boob ok?!