481 days ago I sat alone on the sofa and wearing my pyjamas and a naive head I opened my laptop and began to type. That day led to this day and there is so much in between that I can’t even…

This became such a huge outlet, lifeline and support system during times when I honestly didn’t want to be here any more because everything was just so hard and scary and dark and bad.

This has opened my world and my mind and been so, so positive. Without any exaggeration I really don’t know where or who I would be without my little corner of the internet. Without you.

Other than this post I haven’t blogged about PND for a while now which has left me feeling odd and questioning why. A few things turned me off the idea I think, as much as it pains me to say, and along with reading some really terrible sensationalist stuff made me wonder whether my stuff comes across in the same light as well as becoming more out there with who I really am, in real life, made me a bit more cagey after the mask of anonymity fell.

Maybe too it’s because I am no longer in the depths anymore and have instead started to feel like I can say that I am recovering more than suffering. But I still need that support and a bit of a push sometimes.

All of these things have made me think a lot. About this blog, about the people that I’ve met and spoken to and read all of their lives, and about myself.

So many positives have come from what I have here. And I want to see if I can take them to another level. So think of this as a little experiment.

In July 2015 I will turn 30. This is when I plan to maybe grow up a little. Beans will be at school and I will be older and who knows what else.

Now the cliched 30 before 30 thing has been done to death but I would kind of like the excuse to, well, do things so…

If enough people want to come to the party then it will work like this:

January 2013 will mark the countdown of thirty months until my thirtieth. I want to do something every month, something chosen by you.

Something positive and different and awesome. I’m not talking swimming with dolphins or jumping out of a plane and I’m not talking all night karaoke or streaking – this isn’t going to be about humiliation or aspiration.

I want to do something that adds to just how inspiring and supportive and fun and friendly I have found the blogging experience to be so far.

I’m 27 and I have married the husband and between us we have made another pretty amazing human. I have seen things and done things and with my family I feel both fulfilled and pretty freaking lucky. But there are loads of you sitting reading this with different ideals and values and passions and these could be really brilliant things.

I’m not talking big money experiences – because I don’t have big money – nor am I thinking of some huge PR spamming stunt. We don’t need either.

I suppose what I am saying is here you go internet, take control! Think outside the box and make me do things or read things or see things or think things or try things that will be amazing and positive and exciting.

In an ideal world where unicorns graze next to pink lemonade streams with candy floss clouds I would like for people to suggest ideas. And I would like some people to collect these ideas because I don’t want to know what they are until the 1st of each month. And then I want to make this happen!

The more people that get involved (and I’m really hoping that there will be more than one or I will die of shame) the more interesting it could become as the idea develops…

So oh bloggy readery people, what say you? Help me make the next thirty months?

If you are up for being in charge and collecting the ideas and all that jazz before presenting them each month then please give me a poke here, here or here.

*hands over control*